Marlot Kuiper

123 Getting responsibilities in contradiction to the others, not wearing sterile gloves, the responsibility for communication through the phone was imposed on me. Constantly, I had to find out a smooth and workable balance between being an observer, and being a participant. As time passed by, I learned when and how best to participate to fluently fit into the setting, for example by picking up the phone in the theatre, fastening sterile coats of surgeons before they’d even asked me to, and helping move patients from the surgical table back to their hospital beds on the count of three. In some situations, I struggled with the responsibilities that apparently were part of my ‘job’ (“Am I really going to pick up this phone now?!”) In other situations, I seized the opportunity to ‘get some responsibilities’ with both hands. Sometimes I really struggled with the fact that I was ‘just observing’ other people doing the hard work, especially when I recognized that they could very well use an extra hand. In that sense, it was not only that I liked tying up coats or moving patients, but it helped me feel like I could make a very small but valuable addition to the setting.