Marlot Kuiper

243 ‘The reflexive professional’ is a bad thing!”) as a researcher you should avoid being mistaken as the friend or spokesperson of those observed. Secondly, you need to have perseverance. It takes time to gain access, you have to put time and energy in it. Once you’re in the field, it takes time to collect data, to see patterns, start make sense of them, and even turn them into comprehensible texts. If you’re in for a ‘quick win’ go seek salvation in something else. This PhD project might have been a ‘once in a lifetime opportunity’. It will not be easy to conduct time consuming research like this again. In a time in which you, especially as a young scholar, really need to think about your ‘research profile’ (which predominantly means ‘generate impactful publications’, and preferably a lot) doing ethnographic work may strategically be not your best option. As said, it takes time to access the field, get to know the field, gather your data, think about it, think about it some more, to finally be able to write comprehensive texts about it. To me personally, it’s still one of the most inspiring ways to conduct research, as it will allow you closest to what you are investigating. I would therefore encourage other young scholars to feed their curiosity and start conducting ethnographic research! The personal implications of this study are not confined to future (types of) research. After getting to know the medical domain better and better, I do see valuable future collaborations, for example in the development of training modules for young physicians. In a minor course on policy I have been teaching throughout the years, every now and then medical students signed up because they were interested in how policy ‘works’. I do see possibilities here to develop courses on policy and organising more refined to the medical context. There is a lot we can learn from the medical world, and there is a lot they can learn from us. I think ethnographic research (like all other types of research, but maybe even more) requires continues reflection-in-action. As a researcher, you are a professional yourself. In order to act in complex demanding environments, be responsive on the spot, and learn, you have to constantly reflect on your performances. These intermezzos have helped me to do so. A few months later, I am back in the office with my supervisors. Today we will discuss yet another version of the manuscript. I rewrote some of the intermezzos and added new ones. This time, before we discussed anything else and before I even have to ask for it, the supervisor who was a bit hesitant says: “You got me on board, I loved reading them!” I am glad they are in.