Donna Frost

Chapter 6 202 Wow. Yes. That was something. I had said to her [Margaret], kind of laughing, ‘So, there we have it, I have told you. And what does it mean? Am I an alcoholic?’ And she said, straight at me, ‘Yes.’ That’s something that is. To have that said, just like that, no looking away. Because you know that it’s maybe not good, but you hope that it’s not really that bad either. But now I know. [Breathes in deeply and gets tears in his eyes.] It’s time to make a change. […] I have told plenty of people [health professionals] about this you know, about a drink every day, a few drinks every day. It just gets noted down. But she wanted to know more and she told me straight [nodding]. (NPI- 2014 Pat 21 Con-pp 2 - 3 ) I was exhausted. I couldn’t take another step. I sat down on that bench there to rest and I thought Mara [RN] would get my wheelchair, wheel me back. But she came and sat next to me! Sat and just waited. Then we talked. I was disappointed, you know, I have been wanting to walk further, but I never get further than that bench. […] But Mara asked me to try. To catch my breath and try again. She said if you don’t go further than this bench you will never get further than this bench. Ha! She walked beside me with the wheelchair. […] I didn’t make it all the way but I made it past the bench. (RNI- 2012 Res 14 Con-p 5 ) The two examples above are neither complex nor out of the ordinary. Yet they demonstrate connectedness, straightforwardness and a respect for the ability of the patient to be able to respond to a challenge. The interventions of both Margaret and Mara were transformative, in their ownway, for these two men. These examples are typical of much of the nursing care observed and experienced in the course of this inquiry and typical of this pattern of engagement. Ordinary, everyday events. Not highly technical, no life or death decisions required, no moral dilemmas to struggle with. Yet, at the same time, situations in which the nurse does not choose the easy route. It requires professional artistry to tell someone that you consider him an alcoholic in a way that helps him further and does not alienate him. It requires professional artistry to pay attention to where a person is at, listen to where he wishes to be, and to nudge him onwards when he’s already started to give up.