CHAPTER 4: MONASTIC VOCATION WITH ECUMENICAL IMPLICATIONS 135 mean, one cannot say that that is correct, but if I remember correctly, well, I come from a tradition of celebrating Holy Supper four times a year… and of what I remember, there were always less people since it took half an hour longer, well, if you’d want to skip church anytime, than that time, because, uh… I mean, this is, this is, I am doing a lot of people wrong with this, you know, I realize that, but~….326 This articulates his own understanding at the time. He now knows that this is not representative for Protestants in general, but TA himself just did not have a special interest in the Holy Supper. He adds: Well, I didn’t really understand, you know, I mean, yes, that it is done, but… I mean, of course I knew that it had something to do with what Jesus had done, you know, but um, but it was very, a very shallow understanding of, of the Eucharist or Holy Supper, you know.327 Later on, he concludes: “I did not have a profound Holy Supper-identity, or a deep connection with it when I came here.”328 Against that background, TA speaks about encountering the Taizé liturgy. Only in the community did he learn to appreciate the sacrament. He says: “so, really in Taizé I have discovered the beauty, the beauty of the Eucharist… Um, and for that I’m also thankful, in that sense….”329 TA gives insight in his own, now profound, appreciation of the Eucharist when he reflects on the practice of the community. Speaking about the custom of distributing Communion, consecrated in the early morning Eucharist, during the morning prayer, TA admits: I question this, you know, whether we should do it like this but that is something every brother experiences… um… uh, and the funny thing is, and this is something not… not, not me as a Protestant {laughs}… but almost me as a Catholic in the sense that I understand, well, yes, to do it in this fashion, I do understand that it is very difficult for some traditional Catholics.330 TA reveals his own process from his initial lack of interest in the Eucharist to the point where he feels genuine empathy and pastoral sensitivity towards those who criticize Taizé’s practice because he can intrinsically understand and share their objections. Moreover, TA now understands it to be one aspect of 326 TA-1,8. 327 TA-1,10. 328 TA-1,26. 329 TA-1,10. 330 TA-2,18a.
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